Coming in 2016. Sign up for the newsletter for a sneak peek at chapter one!

A Punk Fantasy

Saturna’s fairytale marriage to her prince lasts three days, then suddenly falls apart. She runs. He rages. Wounded King Vael’Kellen condemns Saturna’s heirs, calls her a useless sow and leaves her nothing but the rank mud at the far reaches of the empire to revel in. Queen Saturna embraces all the dark gifts of being ‘imperial enemy number one’: Saturna arms herself, raises an unstoppable legion of pig-riders and she owns her new, ugly name.

The Cull Sow Queen Saturna and her pig Phaia ride hard against civilization itself to break the world into a new order that suits them fine, as foul but free.

The Knights of the Fire Nexus are old friends of King Vael and Queen Saturna, with a blood-oath sworn to both royals. The Nexites once fought to forge this royal romance and the empire. Now, they must choose sides in a civil war. But, whom can they trust? The story is never as pink-and-black as Saturna or Vael like to tell it. And it’s become clear that for the sake of the kingdom, either Saturna or Vael must be culled.

Omg! When is this thang goin’ down?!

This new story will begin here on Randitty in January 2016. It’s actually based on a wildly successful and hilarious series of fanfiction I once created for a popular video game. Those who remember that fanfic will be able to guess the horrific secret behind Saturna’s separation from her beloved King Vael’Kellen. And I think everyone will love the beautiful, dark punk fury of the pig-riders.

For the nature geeks

What is a cull sow? Seems like a cull sow is a female pig that has been designated undesirable for breeding (or perhaps because she’s bred bad pigs already.) Pigs are also fascinating, smart and actually pretty scary creatures—well, if you let me get my hands on them. Can’t wait!

For the history buffs

Does this story have anything to do with the myth of Theseus and the murderous sow Phaia that rampaged through the ancient Greek countryside? I only found out about the legend of Phaia later, during my story research. But I am thrilled that humans have been excited by the terrifying energy of a vengeful, powerful female pig since antiquity. I hope to tap into that primal, transfixing revulsion.

For the Xena fangirls

No, don’t even ask me that. Of course it’s going to resonate with Xena: Warrior Princess! Kiyiyiyiiii!